Sunny Morning~

yesterday raining,
today~
sunny day~
another way to say is hot~~~
sweat until~
i can say my shirt is totally wet~
really wet...
but just takes it as exercise...
i don't wanna use one bucks just for a very short distance...
so,
just walk~
haha...

can enjoy a lot when you walk~
looking at different cars,
see different people...
really interesting~
^^

the same way,
5-day a week~
kinda bored sometimes...
but
is okay~
i will find the fun inside slowly~
haha~

Love~

LOVE~
a word that you always see it in novels,
especially love novels...
already say is love novels right?
haha~
but
have you ever show or tell it to those you love,
that you love them?
have you?
i not dare to say that i have done it everyday...
but i will try to do it...
'cause is for those i love...
i will try to do it everyday...
i will...

what is love meant for you?
just a feeling of like?
or just a sudden feeling that might gone somedays?
what is it?
for me,
love comes by slowly...
walks in slowly...
you can't realize it very well...
but when you comes to circumstances,
or arguments...
then you only found out the love...
and that love comes by so difficult...
but that's true feeling...
'cause it takes time,
challenges,
and
patients...
so,
don't ever let go the one you are loving now...
no matter what happens...
you won't wanna regret someday...
for your love,
work hard,
manage...
i believe the happiness is just in front...
so,
be true to yourself and the one you love...
that's very important...
share all you have...
be committed...

Love...

In the Rain~

raining in the early morning~
so long never walk in the rain~
although having headache,
still feel so great...
just like those time in school...
didn't get cold or too wet...
let the rain felt on me...
so tiny,
so soft...
and
a bit cold...
ya
but i do think so nice...
each drop just like comforting me...
telling me a different story of themselves...
i like them...
this is one of the reason why i will get sick so easily sometimes...^.<
no reason why,
just wanna feel them...
maybe people will think i am crazy,
but i don't even care...
'cause i just wanna care about myself
and those i love...
others all,
my heart and my mind don't have so many space for them...
sorry to say that...

takes it,
humans are all selfish...
nobody is so generous when comes to all the caring and supporting part...
all the love,
care,
and support,
are just for those they love,
those they really love...
lover,
best friends,
and
of course,
their family...

so i like to feel myself in the rain...
so far so nice...
haha~
'cause i don't walk in the rain while is raining heavily
with thunder and storms all...
haha~
if i did that,
then i think you guys can send me to mental hospital already...
'cause i already crazy...
totally crazy...

Excuses~

one post a day,
enough or not?
for me,
nope...
once comes to words,
i never say enough...

but
i don't have the time...
when i have time,
i don't have the idea~
haiz~
i just like to give excuses~
haiz~
i am so bad...
i knew it...
and i admit it~

bad girl having bad life~
ya,
in people's eyes...
is always satisfy them~
great for them~

i always give excuses~
no matter in what~
so bad,
right?
i just afraid~
i am not as brave as what people see from the outside~
i am not as strong as what people see from the outside~
just pretend to be...
always,
all the time~
bad...
so bad~
haiz~

MayBe~

maybe,
a word that i always use...
showing me lots of "not sure" in my life~
mot sure about this,
not sure about that~
always happen in my daily life~

and this time,
maybe i don't deserve a good life...
ya,
i think so...
whenever i think i can live happily,
wanna start a day happily,
someone will come and splash me with pails of cold water...
early morning
with cold water~
either get cold or
sick...
ya,
sick~
i wish i were sick now~
then i can sleep for few days~
what also can throw away from my mind~
let myself have some space to breathe~
how great~
better than now stress~
haiz~
sad case~
but,
it always happens
and that's just like a cycle~

BAD~

first day working of 2010~
good or bad?
if you ask me that question,
then i will answer you is bad~
i still haven't receive my salary yet,
and i almost get warning letter~
wow~
a very great present for the year~
everything starts so bad~
is worse than i ever thought...
haiz~
what can i do?
i am not the head,
the boss~
i just a tiny one,
or maybe just an useless person in their eyes~
what can i ask from them?
a word from them worth more than mine...

the world is like that~
we can't change the cycle~
this is what i can say~
accept it,
'cause you are part of it,
or ignore it,
and you'll be kick out~
just this two choice...
no more~
bad,
right?

S.U.S.P.E.C.T

you know what is the worst thing happen in the world?
i knew it,
i really knew it since i was young~
maybe when i was 5 or 6~
people suspected me,
why am i giving people so many chances to suspect me?
i don't know why~
am i having those kind of character in me?
i need a mirror,
a mirror that reflects all my characteristics in me~
show me who am i in other people's eyes...
i need to know it,
i don't wanna suffer by people's suspect~
it feels so bad~
you know,
i don't want that...
really terrible~
i don't want it...
that feeling is just like your tears can't come out of your eyes...
you can't cry out,
you can't shout out~
all those kind of feelings~
i don't like that~
not for a person that i don't care even a little bit~
why?
when i think i am happy,
sure something bad will happen~
every time...
so,
if i could choose,
i just wanna people who i love to be happy always...
i don't mind myself is suffering or what...
i just want them to be happy...
no matter what i doing,
i just wanna them to be happy~
see them smile always~
then it's enough for me already~
i don't ask for more~
just that~
enough...